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Most had an understanding about the correlation between personal integrity and outcomes (karma) but few had had a direct experience that anchored in a commitment to maintaining ones integrity. In one crystallizing moment everything became clear to me.
They leave in good spirits and my next identical class comes in. Like the others they are mostly freshman from the Big Island of Hawaii's high schools. As with the first class we co-create the Class Agreements and I assign the identical homework (read the first chapter). It's day two: After about five minutes of scheduled small talk, so as to create some space for communication to take place, I have them form into small discussion groups and share what they got from the reading assignment.
I immediately noticed that the majority had not read the first chapter. I had lapsed into doing my imitation of communication; obviously, I had not communicated that I meant for them to do the homework.
Again I allowed ten minutes to assign the homework. Day three: I begin with, "Is there anyone who didn't do the homework?
" This time about 50% of the class raised their hands. Obviously, their definition of the word agreement was homegrown.
The students also reluctantly confessed that other UH Instructors and Professors were "not as strict" as I was, and that ". I said that it would be OK as long as they would agree to sit in the circle and participate in the discussions and, be willing to be coached.
They both said that they didn't want to be a part of the discussion, merely to sit in the rear and observe. This way." She showed me that I had not placed the fold of the letter in the envelope exactly as she had demonstrated.And, none had raised their hand (per a class agreement) to say so. So, I modified my outline, cut short the discussion groups, and allowed myself 10 minutes to assign the homework. They reaffirmed their commitment to the Class Agreements, one of which was to do the homework. As soon as the second class was seated I asked, "Raise your hand if you did the homework? I acknowledged those that did and those that didn't.For the remainder of the class I had them do small-group work on a subject I took from the first chapter, the foundation for the remainder of the course.They shared that most teachers don't expect everyone to do the homework, and, that they don't check homework consistently. yah, it's easy to con teachers." After class two students went to the Dean with tears in their eyes complaining about me. I should have gone to them both, at the beginning of the semester, and asked if they would support my students in honoring their agreement to communicate upsets to the person with whom they have the upset. As though I didn't know the university faculty communication model (appropriately referred to as the Adversarial Communication Model) supports (behind the back) blaming badmouthing.They just say, "Here's the homework," but they don't mean it. high school teachers accept reasons." Another student candidly said, ". I got a call from the Speech-Communication Department Chairman "requesting" that I meet with him and the Dean. The Dean then said that he and the Chairman would sit in on one of my classes the following day.(no fee) with the following acknowledgment, "Contributed by Kerrith H. It was also a time of awesome struggle in my second marriage; coincidentally, the Sp-Com Professors were communicating much the same as my ex and I.Tags: Adult Dating, affair dating, sex dating